Brace yourselves.  I’m moving into dangerous territory tonight.  I’m going to comment on a video my husband posted to my Facebook page.  So before I start out on my topic I’m gong to state several disclaimers.  #1 I’m in no way, shape, or form upset.  I’ll tell you a secret, if I were upset the last place I’d be talking about it would be on my blog.  So many reasons.  That would be asking for a fight.  There would be a permanent reminder of that fight on the internet.  Everyone would know about it.  Nope, not going there.  #2 I love that my husband saw the video and thought about me.  Seriously, he’s way over there, thousands of miles away, dealing with all the crap he has to deal with and he thought about me.  So even if I don’t agree with the video, I still love it because my husband was thinking about me.  He’s awesome.  He loves me so very much. And I’m so very blessed to have him.

All that being said, today my husband posted a video on my Facebook page. It was about what military wives wish they could say and had a discussion between two women where a non-military woman was trying to compare a deployment to her husband going on a business trip.  I guess I’m not a very good military wife because I can’t find the anger Army wives are supposed to come up with over non-military wives making comparisons to their life.  First, I don’t know when anyone has actually tried to make that comparison.  I guess all the people I know are just well-trained enough to know that’s a bad idea.  Second, why are we so insulted?  I see it as trying to bond.  We all do it.  And us military wives are just as bad comparing ourselves to single moms.  It’s not the same.  At some time we won’t be doing it alone anymore, and we know about when that will be.  The check hitting my account is way higher than what most people get for child support unless it’s coming from a celebrity.  It’s not the same.  But some of the same issues arise.  So when we compare ourselves to someone when we know our situation is different, we are saying it’s the same, but we’re saying we get some of the issues.  We’re trying to relate.  Truth is, no two situations are exactly the same, ever, anyway.  My experience  is different from that of every other person whose husband is on the same deployment.  It’s different from that of the woman without children, the woman with an infant, the woman with teenagers, the woman who had to move out of her house so repairmen could do their work, the woman having to move, the woman with an ill family member.  But we all have pieces that are similar that bring us together.  So instead of fussing that a non-military person just can’t understand, why can’t we just see that the woman is trying to relate?  A husband gone for even a couple of days is a husband gone.  It’s still lonely, it’s still extra chores, and it’s still kids going nuts because they think their life is upside down without Daddy.  Yeah, mine’s in a war zone, but I can’t get myself too worked up about that.  Let me tell you a secret.  I’m not worried.  That doesn’t mean that I am ignoring the danger, and it doesn’t mean I’m not prepared.  But I’m not worried for my husband’s safety.  Worrying won’t help.  Plus, there are plenty of good ways to die here in the states.  I have faith that my husband will not die until his time, and when it’s his time no change of circumstances would change that fact.  I also know he’s in God’s hands, when he dies he gets to go hang in heaven.  And if he goes before me, God will give me what I need to do this life thing without him.  So I’m not worried.

There is one part of the video that would anger me though.  The friend told the Army wife that she signed up for the Army so she should be okay with all that comes with it.  Yeah, I signed up for this life.  I looked at the possibilities and decided I could deal with the crappy stuff and that the benefits outweighed the risks.  But that doesn’t mean that  it makes the crappy stuff any easier.  And if my husband and guys like him didn’t sign up for all the crappy stuff, where would our military be?  We might have to reinstate the draft.

In other news, Clara is wearing underwear now instead of diapers.  She even wore the underwear running errands yesterday.  Yay.  At some point this week we seem to have caught a touch of something and three out of four of us are very, very tired today.  As most of us have it, we spent the day just hanging out not doing much.  I want this to pass because I don’t like any of us being sick.  But if we are gonna be sick, this is the way to do it.  No mess, and extra cuddly children.

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