Chase will be home soon.  Don’t know when, but it should be soon.  I am happy, extatic, super excited, and cannot wait.  But my nerves are also all tied up in knots, and while butterflies aren’t in my stomach, I think frogs have began residence there, hopping and jumping around.

I’m a closet perfectionist.  You can’t really tell from looking at me, or looking at my house, but I had to find a way to live life and I just couldn’t function as a perfectionist.  However, when big events come around I easily turn into an OCD mess.  Chase coming home is a big event.  I have also messed up this event in the past.  Last time he came home from R&R I lost the dog.  When he redeployed…let’s just not go there tonight.  Ever since then I’ve been trying to make up for those mistakes.  And while the house might past muster for even a came home from a month long TDY, I want things to be perfect.  It’s been six months since he’s been home.  I want to show how much I appriciate him by the sparkliness of everything in the house.

I started last Thursday.  I got the living room perfect, I dusted.  And Alaska is a dusty state, there is already a nice layer of dust over everything.  I shampooed the carpet.  It’s already got spots on it.  I know exactly where those spots came from, I cleaned the car today.  Cleaning the car, the kids got wet.  After the kids got wet, they played in the yard (which happens to have dirt, which happens to stick to wet bodies).  After playing, the kids came in the house and tracked dirt everywhere.  (This story reminds me of the story going around Facebook, If You Give a Mom a Cookie.)  White carpet may just be the bane of my existence.  Honestly, something shows up that needs to be cleaned everyday, but I just don’t have time to drag the steam cleaner around all day long.  I now dream of the linoleum that looks like hard wood.  It would be so much easier to maintain.  Anyway, on Thursday, I cleaned the dining room chairs.  Sigh, they are again in need of another cleaning.  One thing has stayed clean (for now), the couches still look good.  But Chase isn’t home yet, the kids have plenty time to take care of them too.

I’ve also been grocery shopping.  That one makes me sigh, as well.  The kids and I eat differently than we used to.  And I’ve figured out how to make things that we eat fit into our budget (most weeks).  But I want to have the things around the house that Chase always craves, soda, chips.  Plus I want to get some treats for him (not going to reveal what I got, got to try to keep somethings a secret).  I blew the grocery budget.  However, it’s a special occasion, and I’m pretty sure that the food I got for a week will last more than a week, so I’m not going to stress over that one too much.

I cleaned the car.  I almost don’t want to admit that I did so, because I did such a horrific job.  And I skipped on an important part.  Shampooing the carpets and seats.  The car is in bad need of those things getting done.  But we are having an Alaskan heat wave, and by the time I finished vacuuming I was done.  (Yes, an Alaskan heat wave, all of you who are dealing with temperatures over 80 can call me a wimp.  What can I say, I’m spoiled to the cooler weather up here.)  That and a security system salesman distracted me.  But mostly the heat thing.

I was feeling pretty good with my progress, the house looks better than it did (for the most part, I think) when Chase was home, and I don’t have him to help with all the extra stuff that he does.  Why am I so pent up now?  I blame my computer.  Our computer has been iffy for a while now.  It’s just old.  I don’t know how old, but I’ll guess around Austin’s age, so six-ish.  It seems that in computer years that’s sixty-ish though.  After Chase left I decided to see what I could do with it.  I installed some new anti-virus, PC-optimization software, and I got it working.  Not working great, but no more unexplained crashes (unless, Xav